Yes it's true, Ivory Pearl B. was almost kicked out of college. Hard to believe when you think about what 2020 Ivory Pearl has now. As I celebrate my 5 year college reunion (virtually of course), I want to share my story in hopes that those who have been struggling with their journey to and through college continue on confident that the Lord will get them through.
I remember being in high school and people telling me over and over again that college would be the best years of my life. When Fisk University chose me and I accepted their invitation to be a part of their class of 2015, I could not be happier. I was excited to get away from my family drama and start a life in a city where no one knew me and I could create the life that I wanted. I had already decided that I was going to move to Nashville, study biology, go to medical school and become an OB/GYN and be the one in my family who "got it right." When I boarded that flight to Nashville in August 2011, I had no idea that I was about to walk into what was some of the most difficult years of my life.
Let me be the first to say that I was not the nicest human in 2011, thank God for growth. So while I did form relationships with people, they weren't the best and a lot of people didn't like me! I wasn't getting along very well with my classmates, my boyfriend broke up with me right before Thanksgiving break, my grades were low because I was struggling to manage the workload, and I had some pretty major health issues. All of this was going on in my first semester of college...and I hated it. At the time, I knew God, but didn't have a relationship with Him so I just pushed through because I knew that I was going to be a successful OB/GYN, I just needed to discipline myself. Fast forward to fall 2012, my sophomore year, history feels like it is repeating itself and I fall into a state of depression from events that took place the year before. I stopped going to class, gained 15 pounds, isolated myself from the world, and cried almost every single night. When I realized I was failing all of my classes and there was no way to change that, I went to administration and acted a complete fool. Embarrassed myself, my family, and likely the institution. I was called into a meeting with my advisor and a few others to discuss repercussions for my actions and they said, to me "Ms. Brown, please understand that what you've done warrants dismissal from Fisk University. However, given your circumstances, we are going to give you a chance to make it right."
I was extended so much grace from my institution by being allowed to stay. But reality hit me when I looked at my GPA for that semester and saw that it was a 0.39 which placed me on academic probation. (I know, I didn't realize GPA's could be that low either). There was a great amount of service that I had to perform in addition to getting back into good academic standing with the university. A beautiful soul that I had the pleasure of getting to know during my time at Fisk invited me to a mentoring group that she was a part of with her church. When I got there, there was a peace that took over me that I had never before experienced. They prayed for me and took me in like I was their own, and from that moment forward, I was a member of their mentoring group and after the following Sunday, their church.
For the first time since I started college I finally sought God and His will for my life. I learned so much about Him and how He viewed me. I began to fall in love with who He said I was, and slowly watched my heart change. My path changed so drastically from then on. I changed my major, committed, my life to Christ, and became a new person. Every semester after that I not only doing better, I thrived. The lowest semester GPA I earned after Fall 2012 was a 3.75. I went from being strongly disliked, depressed, almost kicked out, and on academic probation to a ministry leader with joy in her heart, and graduating with departmental honors, honors society memberships, and a degree that placed me in Cum Laude status. I went from giving up to finding hope in the promises of God. Fast forward to our 5 year reunion! I've earned a Master's, published a devotional, I mentor, serve at church, and I just got promoted to Assistant Principal! God is amazing!
I think everyone has had that experience where they questioned if they made the right decision in going to college, choosing their major, choosing the school they attended, etc. I have classmates that left for a multitude of reasons, I've had mentees that wanted to give up because things got crazy. But I wanted to end this off by encouraging you with the scripture that was on my graduation invitation. "The LORD directs the steps of the godly. He delights in every detail of their lives. Though they stumble, they will never fall, for the LORD holds them by the hand." Psalm 37: 23-24. While things may not be how you thought they should be, God does all things well. Continue to seek Him in all that you do, and if you haven't done so, it is not too late to start. To every college student who is ready to give up, seek Him. To every college grad looking for next steps, seek Him. For every college drop out who is considering trying again, seek Him. In all things seek Him. It is not too late, and if God can turn it around for me, He can do it for anyone.
God Loves You.
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